Today we started our weekly Community Care. For three hours every Tuesday we are designated to different houses of need around Grandview Missouri. I am helping out at a home of twelve children. I began cleaning the upstairs and the Lord began to give me prophetic words to speak over certain beds, I was trying really hard to sing praise songs whenever the Lord was not speaking to me. I came across a room that felt far to familiar. Inside their were boxes stacked and I could tell they were full of medical supplies. There were tubes everywhere and the humming was so loud from all of the different machines. I looked further inside and there was a child in a crib. For confidentiality reasons I can't give details but I figured out why it felt like home. I closed my eyes and could in an instant find myself in Morley's room. For those of you who don't know, Morley is my oldest brother who passed away. I stood their with tears streaming down my face as memories flooded my mind of my brother's life. I began to remember being annoyed that Morley had a room all to himself with all his supplies and machines. I mean how selfish of him! Clearly me being the only female sibling I could surely have the biggest room in the house all to myself. I remember visiting him at the hospital and loving it because everybody always gave me candy. I somewhat figured out if I would have a sad look when I walked past the nurses station holding my daddy's hand they would hand me something sweet and mutter under their breath "oh that poor child." Worked every time! I remembered his funeral when my dad sat me beside Morley's still body for a picture and I didn't understand why he wouldn't wake up when I shook him. He smelled funny and wouldn't open his eyes.
I got down on my knees and asked the Lord what he wanted me to pray over this room. He kept saying 'pray for perseverance to choose to not be offended, pray for them to come through this trial not being offended.'
Latter I asked God if my family had chosen to not be offended. Had I as a child chosen to not be offended or was that something I chose latter on in life. The Lord took me to a dream I had while I was still in Hawaii. I have always had the gift/desiree of healing and prophecy. Previous to Hawaii I had spent years begging God to raise my brother from the dead. I begged him for a dream, for a vision of what Morley did everyday. Jesus answered my cry :)
In my dream it was as if Jesus came into my dorm and shook me to wake me up. I woke up (in the dream) and as soon as I took his hand we found ourselves in a huge field of grass. I asked Jesus why he had taken me here. He pointed over to the right and I saw a handsome man. It took me a while to understand why some of his features resembled me or rather me him. I could sense in my spirit that he had many of the same qualities as me and somewhat the same personality. Suddenly it dawned on me that it was Morley. I ran as fast as I could into his arms. I wept in his arms and let him hold me for hours. Literally I had the dream as soon as I fell asleep and woke up in the morning as soon as it finished. When it was time for me to wake up Morley took me at an arms length and said "Terri-Lynn I want to be here. There is nowhere I would rather be. Stop trying so hard to bring me back home. This is my home. We get to spend eternity together." I woke up shaking and weeping saying over and over "please don't let go of me yet! Not yet, just a little while longer."
Christ revealed to me today that in that moment I had chosen to not be offended. I got it, because I could see and understand why Christ had chosen what he did for Morley. He loves him so much more then my whole families love put together could ever measure up to! He wanted him home.
I guess I'm sharing all of this with you because I understand and have great passion for heart's that are not offended. When we choose in our mind and heart's to not be offended at people no matter how big the situation or how small we automatically position ourselves to receive from Christ. If we choose to be offended when somebody makes a rude comment towards us or when someone gives you that 'look' of disapproval we choose to put distance between us and Christ. Have you ever stopped and thought of if God has offended you? Just stop and think about it! Are you frustrated that God never gave you that opportunity to do a missions trip, or are you offended at him that he took your mom away from you when you were a little girl. This puts so much distance between us and Christ. Often when we look at the bible and it asks us to 'forgive our enemies' we view this as forgiving the big sins and sweeping the little ones away. Beloved our God does not weigh your unforgiveness on how big or small it is! He sees all sin as equal. Choose to forgive...your never going to regret it.
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